Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Weepy days

Yesterday was a day that I cried quite a bit.  I don't know why.  Maybe it was knowing today was coming and the anticipation of possibly finding out what is going on.  I was originally set up for 4 treatments and this is the 4th.  So I am hoping to find out what's next and possibly get a scan done so that I can determine if things are shrinking or not.  It's easy some days to get upset because I wanna be normal again.  I wanna wait with my daughter at the road for the bus to come in the car as I prepare to go to work.  I wanna eat whatever I want to eat and not worry about whether it tastes good or not because I know it tastes good.  I wanna walk where ever I wanna go and not get tired.  For the most part I got thru it.  Thanks to David sitting and talking with me and giving me a hug when I needed it.  And finally after having a little talk with the man upstairs and a heart to heart with myself and I got over it.  I decided I could sit and be sorry for myself or I could do something so I washed a load of clothes and then vacuumed the living room.  That brought me out of the funk I was in.  See I try to stay positive but I am not always positive.  I cry out to God in those times though and He meets me there.  Sometimes it takes a couple of times for Him to get me chilled back out but He always meets me there.  Please pray for me today as I get chemo.  The last time I received it I was the sickest I had been with nausea.  I have medicine this time that I didn't last time so hopefully I will stop it before it starts.  Pray for the next steps that I am fixing to embark on and Pray for peace in every part of this journey.
Love you All

Keep Praying and Keep Looking UP!

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